Brave face

'Eyes bright, chins up, smiles on' Effie Trinket, Hunger Games Catching Fire, Suzanna Collins.

I am a firm believer in the 'brave face', there is no better way to show that life isn't going to drag you down. No matter the situation, no matter where you are, no matter who you are, life is going to try to get to you, its unfortunate but it's true and having a meltdown every time it does isn't exactly going to be helpful. 

Being brave doesn't mean never being afraid, it means doing something even though you're scared, it means showing the world that you are stronger than it is and that you're going to carry on no matter what. So by putting on your brave face you're showing yourself that you are powerful enough to get through it, you're showing the people around you that it's possible.

And by not breaking down every time something doesn't go right you stop yourself from wasting your life in a blubbering mess feeling nothing but self pity. That's kind of a bonus too.

When you have a chronic illness though, you're brave face can take over. You can forget what it's like to not have to put on your war paint and tough it out and sometimes its genuinely just easier to not have to deal with things, to force yourself to be cold and separate from your pain but every so often it can be good to let it slip. I think I forget that sometimes, I wear my mask so often that i don't even realise I am, it's become an automated reply to tricky situations, to strong emotions and to pain, I immediately build my wall. Because that's what chronic illnesses do to you, yes they affect you physically but no one tells you how it's going to affect you mentally, how you have to decide between a life of pity at how bad you have it, or stubbornness at how you refuse to feel pity at bad you have it.

Anybody who knows me will definitely attest to me being ridiculously stubborn, so maybe that's what a brave face is, a mixture of stubbornness, hidden strength and belief that you can make it through the rest of your life if you just smile today.

So everybody, whether you have an illness or not, 'eyes bright, chin up, smiles on!'